Henry : Twelve Months

My darling Henry,

One year ago today, you were placed in my arms for the very first time. Many of those first moments—honestly, those first weeks—are a blur now, but I’ll never forget seeing you for the very first time and feeling your tiny little body curl up against mine.

It was surreal.

You. … Mine.

This past year has taught me many things. I’ve learned how selfish I am. How much I crave time alone, but yet how much you require me. How much I can love even when I feel emptied. How much I long to still be me, while also learning who I am as a mama. How to be a good team with your daddy. How to be silly and have fun in a way that can only happen with kids. How quickly I can memorize a board book (turns out, very quickly). How to comfort a person who can’t talk. How to catch vomit in my hand. I’m very good at that.

I’ve grown in many ways. In a very literal way, you have too. It’s so much fun to remember that you were just over 7 pounds with pretty much zero muscle strength when you were born. Now you’re about 13 pounds heavier and crawling, standing, climbing, moving all the time. You used to squeak and cry; now you jabber and laugh and squeal when we tickle you. You’re taller and stronger and a hundred times funnier. Oh, how I love you so.

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You’ve hit your first birthday with no teeth. I can see ridges on your bottom gums so I’m suspecting they’ll be popping through soon. You are very curious and particularly love the strangest things like the microwave and the coffee maker. You love the vacuum cleaner, but you hate the food processor. You love to walk around pushing the laundry basket (never mind that you have a toy walker specifically for that purpose). You jabber a lot and make us laugh every day.
You have successfully transitioned from formula to whole milk and are great with your tippy cup. You only take one bottle a day now, the last one before bed. I thought that whole change would be harder than it actually was.
You still take good naps, which I’m very thankful for. Because you’ve always gone to sleep on your own, I haven’t been able to rock you to sleep since you were just a tiny baby. As we got closer to your first birthday, I was feeling a little melancholic about that. But last week, I was rewarded with a few windows of opportunity when you were so tired that you finally nodded off against my chest. I think it happened 3 different times and each time, I just closed my eyes and smiled as I felt your deep breath and the weight of your body against me.

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I often joke that you’re doomed because I’m going to be just like Beverly Goldberg, which you’ll hate, I’m certain. (She’s a character from a current TV show; when you’re old enough to read this, you’ll have to look it up on Hulu or whatever streaming app is available by then.) And the thing is that even though it’s a joke (sort of) and Beverly Goldberg is over-the-top, there’s something very true about who she is as a mother. She loves her kids fiercely. She’d do anything for them. Literally anything. She smothers them in kisses and calls them “snuggle monster” and “schmoopie”. She makes up house rules like, “Rule #5: Mandatory hugs every time you walk through the door.” She promises revenge on anyone who has wronged her kids (“Are you crying? Who hurt you? Tell me and I will hurt them tenfold!”) and watches her kids sleep. (I totally do this too.) But she’s a mother. And as a mother, she only wants the best for her kids. I’m not talking about the best wardrobe, the best toy collection, or even the best education.

Of course I, as a mama, want to give you the best of everything, but ultimately, I want to create a pathway for you to become the best person you can be.

A kind human. A gentle soul. A generous heart. A sincere spirit. An honest voice.

That is what I want for you.

Out of all the choices you’ll have in life, I hope you will always choose kindness, gentleness, generosity, sincerity, and honesty.

I love you, my sweet child.

Mama

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Loves: crawling, climbing on and over things/people, self-feeding (peas, black beans, etc.), giraffe wub-a-nub, reading books, being outside, watching people, being nosy, mooching food off of people, swinging at the park, stroller rides, when Daddy comes home, playing with toys that light up, any Apple devices (iPads & iPhones…), walking/pushing toys around the house, climbing stairs, playing the piano
Wears: 9-12M and 12-18M in clothes, size 3 diapers (size 4 overnight)
Sleeping: 8:00PM-8:00AM plus 2 long naps during the day
 
Previously:
Henry : Fifteen Months -

[…] FOUR MONTHS FIVE MONTHS SIX MONTHS SEVEN MONTHS EIGHT MONTHS NINE MONTHS TEN MONTHS ELEVEN MONTHS TWELVE MONTHS Posted in: PersonalTags: childhood, Henry, […]

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