I am in Iowa now. I’m not quite sure how I feel about it yet, but I am hoping that once I find a job and get into my new apartment, I will feel more settled and not quite so emotionally shaky. [Shaky is a weird word. It sort of sounds like a skanky snake. Maybe this is my lack-of-sleep delirium kicking in…]

I am completely torn because I have been looking forward to being with Kevin full-time again since I left a year ago so, in that regard, I am so glad to be where he is. On the other hand, I miss the familiar. I miss going over to Carla’s house to catch up on our TV shows and gossip. I miss working with the girls at the doctor’s office–I got really attached to them. I miss seeing Buckeye support everywhere I go. I miss the morning radio show because there were always entertaining things going on like Mighty Midget smashing people’s TVs and Patrick eating hotdogs and Chauchy doing Treadmill Trivia. Basically, I miss the things that have become familiar to me.

Give me a while and I will get a new set of “familiar” and then maybe I will be okay, but for now, I keep calling on Kevin to console me. Last night when I called him, crying, he reasoned that I was thinking of all the things I will miss, but I also need to think of all the things that are going to be great, #1 being that I get to go over to his house now every evening. When I wailed that I don’t have a job yet, he told me that I could be his full-time stay-at-home girlfriend. It made me laugh…but I did make him cookies today because I was so bored. [I also cleaned my little brother’s room… B-o-r-e-d.] I still miss my sister though and nothing will deaden that, but I am looking forward to this summer when she comes out to visit. I’ll need a good dose of her.

For now, I’m living out of suitcases and cardboard boxes. I might go insane this next month, but I will try my best to keep my head above water and on June 1st, I will unpack things with a fury into my new place.

On a positive note, I get to see Kevin tonight! Hah, I get to see him every night! It’s so weird. Good-weird, but still weird.

For now, Em